Chapter 76

Joy in Life (2)

Everyone lives through hardships of their own.

Even people who seem to stand at the very top, rich people who look like they never have to worry about money, or people who seem to have everything.

Everyone has their own troubles, so they need some way to unwind.

That was why everyone needed some small joy in life. Otherwise, humanity would never have developed something like “entertainment.”

In that sense, before I fell into the Forest of Four Seasons, my joys in life were pretty ordinary.

After working all day, I’d get off work and play a game with a friend.

Or on a day off, we’d all get together for a drink.

Circumstances had kept me from attending university, but those were still small pleasures in my life.

“Phew....”

And now, back to the present.

Starting today, it seemed my joy in life would officially become smoking.

I took a refreshing drag, and the cool aroma sank deep into my lungs.

As though bringing an exhausting day to a close, the smoke drifted softly upward and calmed my mind.

...It’s delicious.

I didn’t smoke the cigar all the way to the end.

I had promised my late father that I would never smoke for the rest of my life.

And yet this hellish environment had forced me to break even that promise.

Still... it wasn’t bad.

At the very least, my mind felt at ease.

Dad, wherever you are in heaven, I’m sorry your unfilial son couldn’t keep his promise.

Please forgive me just this once.

I’m really having a hard time surviving here.

Maybe putting a cigarette in my mouth after never smoking before had made me sentimental.

A faint laugh escaped me.

This would be perfect if I had alcohol too.

But I held back from drinking.

If I started drinking on top of this, I felt like I’d turn into just as much of a drunkard as Passing Dwarf.

Besides, I still had something else to do, so alcohol needed to stay low on the priority list.

More importantly, if I got attacked while drunk, I’d be screwed.

Smoking was better.

First, I should trade with the dwarf.

I opened the wooden box containing the cigars.

I needed to use the ashtray inside.

After tapping the cigar against the ashtray several times, I cut off the burnt end with my dagger.

Cigars weren’t necessarily something you smoked in a single sitting. They could be relit and smoked again.

One of my friends had been a tobacco enthusiast, so I knew that much.

Never thought what he taught me would actually come in handy.

Well, useful knowledge was useful knowledge.

With my mind much clearer than before, I logged into the Gallery—

No.

First, I had to deal with the crabs wriggling inside my backpack.

If you stuck a dagger into a crab’s mouth and twisted it open like turning a key, it would die.

Once they were in that state, there shouldn’t be any problem trading them.

Fish are fine because I cut their heads off, but will this work with crabs?

Because of the Gallery’s rules, living things couldn’t be traded.

That was why I had always done some basic preparation to the fish before sending them over.

But even after forcing a crab’s mouth open, it took a little while for it to die.

Just to be safe, it seemed better to open their mouths ahead of time and put them in a container.

If I placed them in water, their innards would drain out through their mouths, making them easier to clean.

Crack!

I forcefully twisted open the struggling crab’s mouth with my dagger.

The moment I confirmed that some brown substance was leaking out, I dropped it into the container.

I repeated the same process with the other crab and put that one in too.

While they’re draining their blood and guts, I can ask the dwarf.

Ask him what?

Like I said earlier, how to maintain a sword.

He was a blacksmith, and a dwarf at that, so he was bound to know all kinds of useful tricks.

I glanced at the crabs inside the metal bucket, then logged into the Gallery.

Title) Dwarf. Send the trade request in 20 minutes.

Wild Grylls

(Photo of the crabs inside a metal bucket)

These guys take a while to die. In the meantime, give me some tips on sword maintenance.

└ Passing Dwarf) Lol, but there’s no secret technique or anything. As long as you’ve got good oil, paper, and a whetstone, you’re basically set.

└ Wild Grylls) Can you give me all of th— or is that too much?

└ Passing Dwarf) I need my whetstone, so I can’t give you that one. I’ll give you an inferior one instead. But that sword is a damn masterpiece, so it should preserve itself pretty well anyway.

└ Heavenly Demon) Naturally. This lady’s sword was forged from ten-thousand-year cold iron. It shall never rust.

└ Wild Grylls) Ooh;;

└ Passing Dwarf) That’s only half true, so don’t trust her too much. If anything, because it’s made of ten-thousand-year cold iron, you need to take even better care of it.

└ Wild Grylls) So it can still rust?

└ Passing Dwarf) Rust is one thing. The bigger problem is that if it ever breaks, repairing it would be almost impossible. Even for me, it’d be a fucking nightmare. I’d probably have to work on it for days.

└ Wild Grylls) So I really have to treat it like a lover;;

└ Heavenly Demon) It wounds my pride to say so, but entrusting it to that man would not be a bad idea. The blacksmith who forged that sword has already returned to the earth.

I also asked detailed questions about the other things I used regularly.

The crossbow, axe, arrows, and so on.

For most of them, the answer boiled down to properly oiling them so they wouldn’t break down.

The crossbow was one exception because its string eventually needed to be replaced, but the dwarf said he would replace it for me when the time came.

Naturally, I intended to maintain everything properly.

Not doing so would be the height of complacency.

With the Heavenly Demon’s Sword taken care of, I moved on to asking about the next piece of equipment.

Not the Golden Shield—the adamant-something shield.

The one Praise the Sun had given me.

└ Wild Grylls) Can’t I replace it myself?

└ Passing Dwarf) Stop talking nonsense and leave that to a professional.

└ Wild Grylls) Okay;;

└ Wild Grylls) Then how do I maintain the shield?

└ Passing Dwarf) Don’t. Trying to maintain a shield will do more harm than good. Structurally speaking, shields are meant to get damaged eventually.

└ Wild Grylls) I heard this shield has adamant-something in it, though?

└ Passing Dwarf) Then the moment that shield breaks is probably the moment you die;;

└ Praise the Sun) He’s saying exactly what I told you. Remember that.

└ Wild Grylls) Yep.

By the time we finished talking, twenty minutes had passed.

I checked the crabs inside the metal bucket.

They were completely still.

Judging by the look of things, all their blood and innards had drained out.

Now all that was left was the trade.

[Wild Grylls has registered trade items.]

[Wild Grylls: Here. The two crabs you wanted. Clean them and eat them right away.]

[Passing Dwarf: Gonna eat these with booze right now, lol. Hold on.]

[Passing Dwarf has registered trade items.]

[Passing Dwarf: Maintenance tools and oil. That oil is really high-grade stuff, so don’t waste it.]

[Wild Grylls: Okay.]

[Passing Dwarf: By the way, eating the crabs won’t give me some crazy fever too, right?]

[Wild Grylls: Nope. Nothing like that.]

.....

The trade with the dwarf went quickly.

I checked the items that had arrived through the trade.

Last time, everything had come in an ordinary wooden box.

This time, it came in a proper toolbox.

The whetstones, however, had arrived separately.

And there were several different kinds.

This one looks like someone stood a millstone on its side.

One was the kind that rotated, while another was rectangular.

It would probably be better to keep these outside the cave rather than inside.

If the sound of sharpening blades woke Wonmo up, it would be a bit of a hassle.

And this is the oil... Why the hell did he give me so much?

It wasn’t even in a normal bottle.

It looked unmistakably like a liquor bottle.

Seeing thick oil stored inside a brown liquor bottle reminded me of something.

It’s like when Mom used to put soy sauce in an old Coke bottle.

It felt exactly like that.

I couldn’t tell whether all dwarves were like this or if Passing Dwarf was just weird.

Still, he had given me plenty, so I had no complaints.

Next, I checked the oil paper.

Looking closely, it seemed less like oil paper and more like ordinary paper.

Apparently, he expected me to soak it with the oil myself.

Should I give it a try?

Since I had received the supplies anyway, I decided to maintain the Heavenly Demon’s Sword.

I didn’t have anything else in particular to do.

Following the dwarf’s instructions, I slowly began taking care of the Heavenly Demon’s Sword.

The Heavenly Demon’s Sword was a masterpiece capable of slicing smoothly through not only flesh and hide, but even bone.

But even such a masterpiece had gotten dirty in various places because its wielder was a complete beginner.

On top of that, I had fought the Guardian in the morning and then wiped out a group of Guardians around lunchtime.

Come to think of it, I didn’t maintain it at all after killing Mad Dog either, did I?

Maybe that was why the Heavenly Demon’s Sword was rather filthy.

If the Heavenly Demon saw it like this, wouldn’t she fly into a rage?

After briefly entertaining that pointless thought, I began removing the blood and foreign matter stuck to the blade.

First, I applied oil to the flat of the blade and gently wiped it with the paper—

“Ow! That stings!!”

And naturally, my hand got sliced along with the paper the moment it touched the edge.

How the hell did the blade cut cleanly through the paper the instant I brought it near?

I stared at the drops of blood seeping from my finger, then silently reached for the elixir.

I really need to be careful around the edge.

One wrong move and I could end up slicing my entire hand open.

I had even been wearing the World Tree Gloves, and it still cut me.

At least I got to confirm the World Tree Gloves’ regenerative ability thanks to that, but it also reminded me just how absurdly overpowered the Heavenly Demon’s Sword was.

I really do have to treat it like a lover.

A slightly—no, extremely high-maintenance lover.

Even the K2 rifle I used in the military probably wasn’t this troublesome.

I carefully devoted myself to maintaining the Heavenly Demon’s Sword.

The edge was so sharp that working on it was difficult, but somehow I managed to finish successfully.

The price was sacrificing an entire stack of paper, but there was nothing I could do about that.

I’ll probably get used to it little by little.

I propped the Heavenly Demon’s Sword against the cave wall.

According to the dwarf, the best place to store it was somewhere dry and well ventilated.

“I should oil the rest of the tools too.”

The shield, dagger, shovel, axe, and so on.

I oiled everything that could be oiled.

Someone might ask why I didn’t just buy replacements, but this was about preventing them from breaking at an important moment.

Now that I’m done...

I slowly turned my head and looked at Treefast.

Treefast wore his usual defining expression of complete leisure.

Tilt—

When he noticed me staring at him, he tilted his head.

Even the speed at which he tilted his head was frustratingly slow.

But something else had caught my attention.

“Treefast.”

“....”

“Want me to take care of your claws?”

Treefast’s vicious claws needed maintenance too.

I wasn’t joking.

I was completely serious.

Those claws had saved my life several times already.

“Come here. It’ll be good for you too.”

“....”

Treefast gave me a suspicious look for a moment, then slowly approached.

While he made his way over, I prepared the oil and paper.

Wait. Shouldn’t I trim or sharpen claws before oiling them?

I’d never raised an animal before, so I had no idea.

For that matter, there probably weren’t many people who maintained sloth claws in the first place.

While I was thinking, my eyes fell on the whetstone.

Treefast’s claws were hard enough to cut through a metal container, so wouldn’t a whetstone work?

...Probably not.

The size difference was too extreme.

On top of that, Treefast’s claws were spaced too closely together.

After thinking it over again and again, I decided to ask the Gallery.

There were all kinds of people there, so surely someone knew how to maintain animal claws.

Title) Anyone know how to maintain animal claws?

Wild Grylls

(Photo of Treefast’s viciously overgrown claws)

I want to maintain Treefast’s claws. Anyone know what kind of tool I should use?

└ Heavenly Demon) Those are fearsome claws indeed. Maintaining them would be a wise choice.

└ Wild Grylls) He’s my strongest combat asset right now, so maintenance is essential.

└ SwordMaster) Is Treefast really that strong?

└ Wild Grylls) He’s fast. It’s hard enough just to follow him with my eyes;;

└ Never thought I’d live to see someone maintaining a sloth’s claws, LOL.

└ Do sloth claws normally look that terrifying?

└ They need them to climb trees, so isn’t that natural?

└ Passing Dwarf) Don’t ask me. I maintain tools, not animals.

└ Wild Grylls) K.

└ Praise the Sun) Are you trying to cut the claws shorter, or sharpen them?

└ Wild Grylls) Sharpen them. I’m planning to make them even sharper than they are now.

└ Praise the Sun) If that’s what you mean, I can help a little. I maintain my pet lion’s claws myself.

└ Wild Grylls) You keep a lion?;;

└ Praise the Sun) So what? It’s fashionable in Setan. From my perspective, you raising a sloth is stranger.

└ That’s true too.

└ A lion’s basically a cat anyway, lol.

└ Do lions like boxes too?

└ Tigers seem to like them.

This time, Praise the Sun gave me some advice.

Apparently, the way claws should be maintained depended on their characteristics.

Animals like lions and tigers had blood vessels running through their claws, so you had to be careful.

Sloths, on the other hand, didn’t have that issue, so I could maintain them without worrying too much.

└ Praise the Sun) If the claws are packed closely together, just use sandpaper. That’ll be easiest.

└ Wild Grylls) Don’t I need some kind of tool?

└ Praise the Sun) A tool probably won’t work well. Just use sandpaper.

In the end, I used sandpaper to maintain Treefast’s claws.

Treefast seemed to understand that I was taking care of them, because he quietly held out his hand.

Calling it a hand when I’m working on claws feels kind of weird.

Still, these were the claws that had saved my life several times, so I worked on them carefully.

Finally, I wiped them clean with oil-soaked paper.

That finished the job.

Treefast quietly stared at his claws, which were now shinier and sharper than before.

Since his expression always looked the same, I couldn’t tell whether he liked them or hated them.

“You like them?”

Nod— Nod—

Even his nodding was ridiculously slow.