Chapter 34

If there’s nothing to be done, then it can’t be helped.

The goblins of the Runga Tribe were divided into two groups.
A small minority of idiots who believed I was the incarnation of the legendary Serpent “Ululu-ululu.”
And the majority who thought that was complete nonsense.

The ratio was roughly 2 to 8.
Honestly, even 20% was higher than expected.
After all, Ululu-ululu as depicted in their drawings was a flying black Serpent.
The only thing we had in common was that we were both Serpents.

“Ululu-ukulu!”
“Ah… Ululu-ululu.”

The goblins who believed I was Ululu-ululu would clasp their hands and chant the name every time they saw me.
It felt like I had become some kind of roadside Buddha statue.

I looked into why this misunderstanding even happened.
The old shaman goblin I first met had clearly said, “Serpents are sacred creatures.”
In this Runga Tribe, goblins genuinely did not treat Serpents carelessly.

It might be natural.
Thinking Serpents are evil is just prejudice held by some ignorant people.
In some places, Serpents are worshipped as gods of prosperity.
In fact, on Jeju Island, people once worshipped a Serpent deity called Chilseong.

This place was similar.
The shamans prayed to various goblin gods.
Among them was a powerful Serpent god called Ululu-ululu.

A mighty serpent deity that defeats the evil “red, headless Serpent.”

So I asked why they thought I was that god.
Of course, “asked” is putting it simply—the process was ridiculously difficult.
I had to pretend to be interested in their scriptures, and one shaman spent an entire day reading them aloud to me.
That’s how I pieced it together.

First—Ululu-ululu, the sacred serpent god, understands goblin language.
Ordinary beasts or monsters can’t understand speech, but Ululu-ululu does—and is kind and gentle.
It lives among the Runga goblins and drives away their enemies.

Yeah… that’s me.
I can’t even deny it. That’s basically just describing me.
Kind? Check. Gentle? Check.
I even ate a few enemy goblin hearts.

Second—Ululu-ululu spits out the Water of Life.
This water heals the wounded, and those who drink it gain health and longevity.

Water of Life?
Some goblins shouted “Ululu-ululu!” when I made potions. That must be why.
Since they don’t even know what a potion is, it probably looked like divine water to them.

But I didn’t “spit” it out—I boiled it with Nanaruk’s help.
And drinking something a Serpent spit out? That’s disgusting.
And eternal health? That’s ridiculous.
Pelerian’s potion doesn’t do that—it just heals wounds.

—Hmm, there is something I didn’t tell the buyer when I sold the potion recipe.

“What is it?”

—If you take it continuously for a long time, it might cause a certain condition.

“…What?”

When I asked what kind of condition—

—Ahem. Infertility.

Terrifying.
Then is it safe for women?

Honestly, Pelerian was impressive for selling it without mentioning that.

—They wouldn’t even know they had it. I only discovered it accidentally while researching chimera.

So basically, fraud by omission.

More importantly… he researched chimera reproduction too?
Calling him a mad scientist wasn’t even enough.

—A chimera capable of reproduction was my dream.

Ah.
That explains it.

A reproductive chimera… that’s practically creating an entirely new species.

Anyway, back on topic.
I am not Ululu-ululu.
Being mistaken for some mythical Serpent isn’t exactly pleasant.

—Why not? It’s a great opportunity. Heh.

Seeing Pelerian’s sly grin made me like it even less.
And for good reason.

According to the legend, Ululu-ululu eventually dies.
It defeats the red headless Serpent, but becomes exhausted and wounded.
In the end, it throws itself into flames and ascends to the sky.

In other words—it dies.

“What if those goblins throw me into a fire alive because of that?”

There’s nothing more dangerous than fanatics.
I’ve actually met one in my previous life.

I had a “friend” who approached me first, despite my extremely limited social life.
They were suspiciously kind.
So kind they even worried about my ancestors.
Apparently, my ancestors were clinging to me with grudges, causing my life to go wrong.
They said a ritual costing five million would fix it.
I told my father and got beaten half to death.

When I apologized to my “friend,” their face went cold and they dragged me to a prayer retreat in the mountains.
I escaped barefoot and got scolded because I didn’t even have taxi fare.

“Anyway, it’s depressing.”

—You could turn those foolish goblins into your followers and use them as meat shields.

I ignored Pelerian.
At least the sane goblins like Nanaruk didn’t mistake me for Ululu-ululu.

“Um… Serpent God.”

When I ignored those calling me Ululu-ululu, one goblin approached me and used the title “Serpent God.”
Fine. I’ll tolerate that much.

“My child is sick.”

A goblin woman pushed her child toward me.
The child looked in terrible condition.
Probably some kind of illness.

“Please… sob…”

What am I supposed to do?
Go find a doctor or a shaman.

But I couldn’t ignore a crying mother.

—Clearly dehydration. Drank dirty water, got diarrhea, couldn’t eat properly.

Thankfully, I had Pelerian—basically PelerianGPT.
His remote diagnosis was excellent.

—Boil clean water with meat and feed it. That should fix it.

You heard that, ma’am.

“Sniff… sob…”

But I had no way to communicate that.
And I couldn’t just give away potions.

Fine. Whatever.

I swung my ring-wearing tail.
Inside my subspace storage were various items.
Not much space, but there were emergency rations.

A chunk of crocodile tail meat dropped out.

“Th-this is…!”

Both the baby and the mother looked starved.
Even if goblins got along, there were always those who went hungry.

• [You use Beginner Elemental Magic: Water Lv.1]

I didn’t blast them with a water cannon.
Instead, droplets of water began falling from empty air.

The goblins stared in shock.

“When Ululu-ululu roared, rain fell from a clear sky!”
“It’s Ululu-ululu!”

Why is there another shaman in the crowd?!

Shhh—

I didn’t roar, and this wasn’t rain.

The goblin woman alternated her gaze between me and the water, then took out a leather flask and collected it.

“Sacred water… thank you.”

It’s just water.
Still, it’s a hundred times better than muddy water.

“Ululu-ululu shall spit out the Water of Life and heal the sick…”
“Ululu-ululu! Ululu-ululu!”

That crazy shaman.
Would I get experience points if I ate her?
Might be worth testing.

I slipped away from the crowd.

But once a misconception takes root… it’s terrifying.

After that, incidents where I was mistaken for Ululu-ululu kept happening again and again.

Serpents have something called the Jacobson’s organ.
It’s a secondary olfactory organ inside the mouth that allows them to detect chemical scents carried on the tongue.
That’s why Serpents constantly flick their tongues.
As a monster, I had that organ too.
And it granted me a special ability—

The ability to sense rain before it fell.

I had been lazily basking in the sunlight, raising my body temperature.
The goblins were also enjoying the good weather, hanging out their laundry.
But then—I smelled rain.

Since Serpents are cold-blooded, getting drenched in rain isn’t good for us.
So I hurried under a roof.

Rumble—

And right after that, a thunderstorm poured down.

“As expected… Ululu-ululu commands lightning and rain…”
“Ululu-ululu!”

Unbelievable.
Why would a Serpent that controls storms be hiding from the rain?

Pelerian burst into laughter.

He seemed to enjoy being worshipped.
Even though I was the one being worshipped—not him.

There was another incident.

Before heading to the dungeon, I went hunting to level up.
And I managed to take down a fairly large bear—
an owlbear that looked exactly like an owl.

It was too heavy to carry alone, so I called some goblins to help move it.
Then one of them suddenly screamed upon seeing it.

“Aaaah! Aaaah!”

I was startled.
Apparently, that owlbear had eaten his father.

“That’s it! That’s the one!”
“Ululu-ululu!”
“Thank you! Thank you so much!”

Are you sure it’s the same owlbear?
I can barely tell goblins apart—how is he so certain?

I was getting a bit tired of this.
So I seriously asked Pelerian why they were acting like this.

—That’s just how goblins are as a race.

A very racist remark, but I listened anyway.

—Goblins instinctively seek something to believe in and rely on. They’re diligent, and that makes them obedient. They’re born to be ruled.
“That’s a bit harsh.”
—I’m not insulting them. That’s simply the truth. The world is inherently two-sided. Goblins are loyal and faithful—arguably better than humans in that regard. They just need something to follow. Pitiful creatures…

…

So that’s how it is.

Anyway, I have no intention of ruling them as their Serpent god.
It was about time to leave.

—A wise decision. It would be ideal to enslave those goblins, but if not, we should head to my dungeon as soon as possible.

My level had already passed 5.
I still couldn’t use Heavenly Thunder yet, but I had potions now.
It was time to go.
What if those goblins actually looted the dungeon?

I returned to my home.

Yes—I had a home here.
It was Nanaruk’s house.

I climbed up a pillar and slipped through the window.
Her younger siblings welcomed me.

“Whitey!”
“You’re back.”

…Maybe “Whitey” is better than Ululu-ululu.
At least these kids didn’t call me a Serpent god or bother me.

Is your sister not back yet?

“She’s getting scolded by father. She’ll be back soon.”

I was surprised—he answered as if he had read my mind.

Nanaruk’s father was the chief of this place.
So technically, she was something like a princess.
I never would’ve guessed, seeing how she fights with a blade.

But it seemed her relationship with the chief wasn’t good.

By the time it got dark, Nanaruk returned.

“Rechi, Riandal, Zadiram—I’m back.”

She had three younger brothers.
Rechi and Riandal were still children.
Zadiram was a warrior who had evolved into a hobgoblin.

She greeted me too.

…Wait.

Her face was slightly swollen.
Had she been crying?

Her oblivious brothers didn’t seem to notice.
Nanaruk herself didn’t show any sign of being different.

This household consisted only of Nanaruk and her siblings.
We all gathered and shared dinner together—
some kind of monster meat soup of unknown origin.

After eating our fill, it was time to sleep.
In a single room, straw bedding was laid out, covered with blankets, and everyone slept together.

Her younger brothers fell asleep almost instantly.
Moonlight poured in through the window.

So… today is my last day here.

Pelerian entered the ring to rest.
He actually spent more time inside the ring than awake.

I enjoyed the rare silence.

Honestly… I almost grew attached to this place.
It wouldn’t be bad to just stay here.
The goblins treated me well, and it was comfortable.

But I couldn’t.

The fairy tracker could show up at any time.
And if that happened, these goblins might be put in danger too.
I needed to become stronger.

I looked at Nanaruk.
She was sleeping peacefully.

Thank you… for everything.
Take care.

I should leave at dawn.

I closed my eyes as well.
Hopefully, I’d have a good dream tonight.

But I didn’t.

Of all things, I met that insane elf woman in my dream.
She raised a short sword and chopped me into pieces like grilled eel.

“…It was just a dream! Phew.”

When I opened my eyes—
my body was intact.

But my heart was pounding.

That’s when I realized the cause of the nightmare.

My survival instinct—my friend—was warning me.

There was a hobgoblin standing in the room.
His face covered with a mask, a blade in his hand.

An assassin aiming to kill Nanaruk.

I moved instinctively.

• [You use Stealth Lv.6]
• [You use Acceleration Lv.5]

Quietly and swiftly, I approached—

And sank my fangs into his ankle.

The assassin looked down at me, startled, breathing sharply.

Hello there.

Do you, by any chance… have poison resistance?